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Last updateTue, 06 Aug 2013 2am

Back You are here: Home Curiouser and Curiouser
Curiouser  and Curiouser

Curiouser and Curiouser

C&C: Have you ever broken into a pool/hot tub area at the Hilton in Los Angeles at 1am?

Y’know, come to think of it I have. It was last summer (2011), and these two broads really wanted to go sit in the hottub, which was outside, surrounded by a wall with a fence on top of it.

C&C: What do you have in your pockets?

Bobby pins with bulby black tips. Nearly always.

C&C: Chicken or the egg…. photos or stories, which came first?

I’m not sure if you’re asking me two questions here or one. I’ll answer both. I always find the chicken and egg question ridiculous. People take it too literally, thinking of chickens as we know them and eggs as these hard white objects with shells and yolks. But an egg is the source of the chicken and the source of all vertebrates (and I think most invertebrates), so the egg was first. Unless we’re talking about cloning, there is no life form without an egg of some kind.

C&C: Do you like the X-files? If not, explain yourself. And tell what your favorite tv show is and why.

C&C: Do you have favorite fairy tales? Tell me about them. You write some lovely twisted ones, how interested are you in old fairy tales?

In most any fairystory I read there is something that amuses me, especially the Grimm collection

C&C: What was your favorite toy as a child and why?

Easy… I had a five-foot (at least) styrofoam replica of a t-rex skeleton. I have no idea where my parents found it, and I’ve never met another person who had one as a kid.

C&C: Climbing – Would you engage in a climbing contest with me? Say there were two trees side by side, similar in build, and I beat you? Would you be a gracious loser or a sore loser and claim ridiculous things like the branches were less evenly spaced or covered in excess sap on the tree you were dealt?

I would gladly take this challenge. In fact, I will challenge anyone to a climbing contest. Barefoot or shoed. I don’t really climb rocks, because it’s too weird to make friends with rocks, but trees? Yeah. A thousand times over. Trees are the kind of people you can trust not to drop you or push you off.

C&C: Have you ever broken into a pool and hot tub area at the Hilton in LA at 1am?

Ha. No.

Okay, yes. But, it’s fine. Richard Thomas still believes he never left his room. I daresay you and I work well together, Ms. Curiouser.

C&C: You went to a dance class and that’s where you met your wife? Were you going specifically to troll for women?

It was a Salsa Club, and I was actually visiting another friend of mine in Chicago. It was more of a “I’m in your town, I will do whatever” kind of thing, and my wife and one of her friends were also friends with my friend. What a friendly sentence. There was no effort to meet women. There never has been as I have a distinct lack of self-esteem – not low self-esteem, just no self-esteem. “Why bother?” becomes my mantra for many things (not in too negative of a sense though). At any rate, she went to get some water for the table, I went along to help, and she said maybe three words to me. But I was persistent and annoying and it worked. The main thing I remember from that night is there was an unofficial greasy male gogo dancer going crazy on one of the podiums at the first club (Biology Bar, now closed or burned down I think) and at the second club (Liquid – maybe still open?) the friend I was visiting had a dancer get a little too handsy with her, which kind of ruined the night.

C&C: When you’re in the house do you generally wear shoes or are you barefoot or in socks? What about right now?

Genetics and altitude dictate that I wear socks whenever possible. My father has chimpanzee hands for feet. As a kid I remember seeing them hanging off the couch and I’d wonder if he was a government experiment gone wrong. My mother said it was due to ill-fitting shoes as a child, and maybe she’s right, but the toes would curl over as if holding an invisible roll of coins. The big toe was more thumb-like too, and leant away from the rest of the toes. When I hit my growth spurt during my teens, my feet began to get longer. I say feet, but it was my toes. The actual foot remained the same size.

 C&C: Do you dress up to take your kids trick-or-treating?

I dress up even when it’s not Halloween. So, yeah, definitely then. And, I guess I could use the kids as an excuse, but, I mean — it’s Halloween, right? How can somebody not dress up? Last year, or maybe the year before, I even won the CU costume contest. Had to do the (conventional) splits on-stage for it, though, which meant leg wraps for weeks afterwards. But it was worth it, and, if you’re a zombie cheerleader, you’ve got to sell it, too.